If I could change one thing about myself, I would be less outspoken. I have stuck my foot in my mouth more times than I can count, and in the process have hurt the feelings of true friends. I have alienated acquaintances. And I have created an image of myself that isn't altogether true.
I wish I could be one of those people that are seen as agreeable. I would love to sit back and fade into the sidelines and just be Staci's Mom for a bit. But whenever I try to keep it on the inside, this voice bubbles up and spills over and I end up lashing out in the form of a facebook link overreaction or a heated (and well researched) rant. It's not that I TRY to be over the top. I just am.
For example, some time ago I read an article about a hospital in Colorado that has banned The Bradley Method. I find this to be completely ridiculous for many reasons that I will save for a different post, but when I shared the link to the article I stated, "these doctors should lose their licenses". Do I REALLY think they should lose their licenses? Of course not. But I DO firmly believe that ANY doctor who has done their research would never ban the safest way of having babies for healthy pregnancies, mothers and babies. I do think these doctors have not done their research and are doing women a disservice by disallowing them to trust in themselves and their bodies. This comment got a heated debate going in which a childhood friend (who is a doctor) had much to say.
The problem is that when I bubble over, I then care about what other people think. I want to be opinionated. And I want everyone to agree with me. I don't want there to be any hurt feelings. So, I need a filter, but I'm not happy if I try to filter the things I feel strongly about.
So, acknowledge our differences, and love me anyway?
Opinions happen when you become a mom.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what it is, but my gosh, you never have as much to say as you do the second you become a mother. Everything you do is the right choice because you are doing it. So, to you, Bradley is right, breastfeeding is right, babywearing is right, etc. To others, maybe not (and they probably have just as much research to back their own opinions/values up).
I think that one of the hardest jobs of interacting with other mothers is trying not to cringe when they do something you desperately don't agree with or approve of. I can say that I'm much better at this now (so you can only IMAGINE how awful I was before!!!) than I was when I was a new mom with Jackson. I think it takes practice, confidence in your own style of parenting, and humilty in understanding that you may not be right. And a whole lot of strength to just walk away! :)
Ramble, ramble. :)
Thanks for the comment, I appreciate it! you are so right. :)
ReplyDeleteMegs-- Your passion is part of why I love you :) Never apologize for who you are. Love you! MUAH!
ReplyDeleteI meant to ask you...why did the hospital ban Bradley? I mean, that makes NO sense to me. Did they ban all natural childbirth? I was gonna ask you on FB, then decided I'd better not! ;)
ReplyDelete@Mandy--thanks!! I love you, too! :)
ReplyDelete@Bex--honestly I don't know the reason. I think they are misinformed, thinking that a Bradley method birth includes a birth plan prohibiting a doc's intervention no matter what. this is not the case, in face, the first sentence on my birth plan was 'as long as mother and baby are safe' blah blah blah. I went to a hospital for the just in case, ya know? as did 8 out of 9 women in my class. and 2 ended up needing c-sections (one breech, one baby in distress with meconium). this is not the norm for most classes but how it worked out in mine. anyway, I honestly think it's b/c they haven't done the research to understand what the bradley method is and that's why I am so upset at the whole situation. It makes me think it's just b/c they want you to adhere to the hospital's schedule which is ridiculous. I could go on and on and on and on LOL